Love vs. BEing Right: The Vulnerable Journey to Unity
In a World Divided more than any time in history, we are at a crossroads. Do we continue to defend our Need to BE Right? Or can we Open ourselves up to LOVE and the Vulnerability to Journey into Unity?
2020 was meant to be a time of Ascension, however, instead it became a World Divided between our need to be Right that came with the discord COVID brought. Then later that same year – we became even more divided with the vaccinators versus the anti-vaxxers. What was clear is that we spend inordinate amounts of time researching and accepting only the research that agreed with our beliefs and perceptions. We justified our separateness and fractured our connections with friends and family. All for the Need to BE Right!
It meant more to BE Right and divided than finding Openness and Unity. We spent inordinate amounts of time on Social Media, creating discord with those we didn’t agree with and liking those we did. We used Social Media as a way to unite with other like-minded people. And we often confuse posts with news.
Our division continued to create anger and hatred of those who didn’t agree with our beliefs. Then came the elections in 2024-25. The same discord occurred but now there appeared to be more division. Americans were divided through politics. Which allowed Canadians to become fearful as a result of the American election outcome. And our own elections in Canada following shortly after that offered the same separations/divisions. And somehow, again, Social Media became the resource to research and troll.
AI added another dimension to our discord, as we often couldn’t discern what was created by AI, fake news, or the actual truth. This allowed many people to sensationalize their posts to receive the maximum amount of likes and engagement. And the fighting still continues. The amount of anger, hatred, and division continues.
James Twyman has come out with a chance to help us find Unity, in his latest book “I Don’t Know, Maybe, I Love You.” I believe this is a groundbreaking book that reminds us that our Division has come up because of our Need to BE Right. And the book further complements my own thoughts of navigating our Overwhelm to encourage us to connect with our Divine. And no matter how many times I have tried to write this blog, I kept getting distracted with my need to BE Right.
It has become clear that our identities were/are attached to BEing Right and we were/are feeling threatened if anyone thinks differently. Our Identity became our Beliefs in this world of divisiveness. When our Identity is threatened, we react! And let me tell you, it was NOT pretty. The anger and hatred this enabled through Social Media was honestly shocking. People I know and Loved for the first time focused on politics and what they believed was right. I saw the divisiveness. I saw the challenging nature of their remarks.
And often it was a dumpster fire I couldn’t stop watching. I felt justified while reading posts that collaborated with my ideals and my way of thinking. While in the posts of others I was trying to understand how they could possibly believe what they wrote. I can honestly say, I am still struggling with the dichotomy of the beliefs out there. But why are my beliefs any better than someone else’s?
This is the question that James Twyman has offered. If we didn’t Need to BE Right, could we BE Vulnerable enough to listen to the opposite views of our friends and family? Can Love guide us towards Unity instead of the division of the Huge discrepancy between our beliefs?
Unconditional Love
We all strive for – or desire – Unconditional Love. Yet we struggle with all the conditions we have placed on Love instead. The concept of Unconditional Love is fascinating. Unconditional Love is NOT a feeling. It is an action. It is a Gift we GIVE.
Generally, while we believe we unconditionally love something or someone, we still have expectations that if we give we should receive. We anticipate that our giving of Love be reciprocated. Also, we often ‘do’ things with the prospect that we will Get what we Want out of the Love we give. An example of this would be when we get the groceries and cook the meal – a loving response would be to clean up after. If we Love someone enough, they will Love us back. If we put up with their antics – we will be rewarded with more love. None of these are examples of Unconditional Love! They are rather a way to, hopefully, manipulate others.
Growing Up
As Tom Campbell often reminds us, our Purpose is to Grow Up. Growing up is lowering our entropy – BEcoming Love over Fear. Our fears are inundating our beliefs, behaviors, patterns, and the stories we tell ourselves. We often have these established before the age of 7 when we aren’t emotionally, physically, mentally or spiritually mature. Often the fears are so ingrained in our minds that we don’t even realize how much these fears are unconsciously motivating us.
While we make an effort to understand our unconscious fears and how they block our purpose of Growing Up, we have to know what the fear is. People believe that the opposite of Love is Hate. However, this isn’t accurate. The opposite of Love is Fear. Anything that isn’t Love is Fear.
I believe we all go through our lives with Core Fears that we Consciously chose to work through. The core fears are often Fear of Abandonment, Failure, Success, Unknown, Death and Loss of Identity (some examples).
What do we do once they are identified – we identify our core fears by examining our reactions and uncovering what you are most afraid of? We look at examples within our lives that we consciously remember. Then we work at acknowledging, accepting and then Letting them Go.
Acknowledging them means seeing all the patterns from our past that supported this belief. I’m always abandoned. It comes from a deep place that we believe through our experiences are Truth. However, if you asked your Higher Self or your Divine Connection to Source if this is true… the resounding answer is NO! But our unconscious mind and Ego have already established a place in our incredible brain that it’s true. And it becomes unconscious – and we don’t question it as a truth because our patterns and experiences “prove it” to us, we believe.
If you can take the path that questions why we are reacting in anger, pain, sadness, shame or any other negative emotion, then you can identify the fear by asking, inside yourself, in your heart, to understand the truth. And you will likely find that you are holding onto a fear.
Acceptance is the next stage of our growth. If we can accept that we have this core fear impacting our decisions and actions we can take steps to just BE. Acceptance is allowing our Conscious mind to see the truth. Acceptance is a way to sit within our Divine Self and BE present to where we are on our journey. It isn’t about changing, fixing or healing a core wound. It is allowing it a voice. And it is a beautiful moment when we find ourselves BEing Grateful for the service this fear has allowed us. It is an opportunity to move to the next step, which is Letting Go.
Letting Go is a common theme in my work. You can’t get Let Go – unless you acknowledge, and then accept, the fear that is blocking you from your Truth and your Divinity. There are several books on the topic I recommend. Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender by Dr David R. Hawkins. Or The Universe Always has a Plan: The 10 Golden Rules of Letting Go by Matt Kahn.
The practice of Letting Go is powerful. It recognizes that we have the ability to respond to our world from a place of mindfulness and clarity. Letting Go is intentional. It is acknowledging our responsibility to Accept that things happen. And to accept that we aren’t in control. We can, however, be in Charge of how we show up in the World. We can choose how we want to accept, respond, and express our Intentions – instead of holding onto our fears. Letting Go awards us the opportunity to BE authentically who we are without fears. Without fears, we have the choice to choose LOVE. And we can choose to Grow Up.
The Vulnerable Journey to Unity
The challenges here stem from whether we acknowledge, accept, and Let Go of the Need to BE Right. Can you see how this need is about Ego and our Need to Justify this Need to BE Right? It’s all encompassing and often difficult to see as we are often unconscious and in reaction – instead of conscious and responding to each situation individually.
BEing Vulnerable – unfortunately, has many false definitions. Most people believe vulnerability is a negative reaction. It has been labeled as a ‘weakness’. But it needn’t be. In fact, My definition of BEing Vulnerable is to allow for an Opening of one’s Heart. This means opening up emotionally to Self and Others. Holding Space (which to me means listening without judgement, just BEing Present for another) while BEing Vulnerable is a beautiful gift. I see vulnerability as a strength because it helps us BE more Open and our Hearts will respond Lovingly.
James Twyman shares that to BE Vulnerable we must BE Truthful. It means that we share our intimate feelings with others who we trust. Being honest with ourselves is NOT easy, as we often feel the need to BE Liked and Accepted. If we voice our vulnerabilities – can we share them? It certainly is one way to discover if we can trust someone with our deepest fears and insecurities.
And to voice our vulnerabilities also requires speaking the Truth – even if it hurts us or feels like it might. However, please remember that BEing Vulnerable isn’t speaking what we see as the Truth of someone else. It only works if we can speak the Truth about ourselves.
The need to BE Liked is a fear that has been ingrained in our psyche from a very early age. Ironically, it stems from our first experiences of Unconditional Love and when we felt that disappearing because of something we did that triggered another person. We felt those times when Conditions were Placed on BEing Loved. Those conditions – the things that other people expected us to do to be worthy of love – became something we tried to avoid – and we did this by BEing Likeable. Even if we didn’t meet the conditions set on us by others in their expectations of our love coming back to them.
This fear – of not being loved or even likeable – is a very difficult one to accept and Let Go of. After all: who doesn’t want to BE Liked? However, if we are confident in who we are and dedicated to BEcoming Conscious – then we just need to Breathe into our fear when it arises. An example of Breathing into your fear – would be to take a moment and just Consciously Breathe even if it feels uncomfortable.
And trust becomes a huge issue around who we can Open up to and BE Vulnerable with. Trusting those to whom we feel that we can open up to is just something we have to accept: that it isn’t our business if someone ‘Likes’ us! It is our business to BE Love, to BE Vulnerable and to Grow Up.
Our Journey isn’t a destination – it is an ongoing quest for experiencing more and more Love and for Inner Growth. The quest is continuous and never ending. We Grow, Change, develop our Consciousness, Heal our inner wounds and fears, and Embrace Connection. The Journey to Unity is to hold space for others even when we disagree. It is to Accept, Acknowledge and Let Go of our own divisions within ourselves.
At a time when the World is at its most Divided we have an opportunity to Hold Space and Actively Listen to others. Instead of defending ourselves … we can just BE! Because what truly matters is LOVE. There is NOTHING more Powerful than Love. Love Unites. And as we have seen: Fears Divide. And having to BE Right is a choice we make – when we feel we are more important than someone who has another belief. When we feel that we have researched and accepted a truth and must justify it regardless of another. It is our Ego and Fear that makes us feel Right and that another is Wrong.
Join me on this journey towards Unity. Let’s be Vulnerable and Open to the fact that everyone has a right to believe what they want. Because in the Bigger Picture – how do we really know? We Don’t! We are all having an experience and we have all been shaped by our past experiences. What I may see as Truth – someone else may see as a lie or partial truth. Ultimately, the question you want to ask is … Do you want to BE Right or BE Happy? Do you want to BE Love or be in fear? Can you BE Vulnerable? Would you prefer to live in a World Divided or United? Always Choose LOVE!!❤️