Validation
This has been a fascinating month! I have learned and discovered some powerful processes. My focus has been on “when the Law of Attraction doesn’t work” for some time. This past month I figured out a huge piece of why this Law doesn’t always work for everybody. The LOA puts the focus on “doing” everything “right” in order to create the change we want to see in our outside reality. However, I believe it is important to know our motivation and what is driving us, then begin to make the changes from within ourselves, so that we can focus on connecting with our core essence versus this outside “thing” we want to create in our lives.
Consider the following:
1. Our motivation isn’t necessarily as simple as fear versus love. Rather it is often something we are trying to “change, fix, heal, manipulate or control” from a place of fear. We need to ask ourselves what do we want to accomplish with this goal, change, etc.? If we keep asking the question “why”, the answer will almost always be “happiness” in some form or another. Our motivation to change, have a million dollars, a better relationship, a better career, etc. is all about the pursuit for inner happiness.
2. What is happiness? What does it even mean? It is most definitely an inner feeling/emotion. It definitely isn’t “out” there. It is a frequency of energy that is labelled good. But, what is it? We seem to be on this outer search for something that can only be fulfilled from within ourselves. However, when we feel emptiness within our being or a void that is longing for something, we begin to create from this place of longing and emptiness in our outer world. When we try and fill this longing within our hearts and souls with outside “things” in hopes of creating a more fulfilling and happy life, it doesn’t work. No matter how much we “do” the “right” things, when we attempt to mould our outer reality without connecting with and addressing our inner reality, we will not be successful.
3. We continue to watch our outside world for validation that we are “doing” it right and creating what we desire. However, it can never be created from the outside-in! So why is our focus on validating our outside world? We are not defined by our outer world, but from our Inner World. When we continue to focus on what we can “do” to change, fix, heal, control and manipulate our outside world, then we are creating from a void in our inner world; not the other way around! It is almost as if we are trying to will our desired reality into being. Unfortunately, creating the life you love is not about a battle of wills. The sheer force of your desire will not manifest your hopes and dreams until you understand how to create in harmony with your inner self.
Currently we believe that if we want something different in our outside world we need to “do” something different! LOA taught us that if we change our thoughts, our emotional responses (that are unconscious) and are doing it right, than our outer world will change. What I now am beginning to understand is that we have to change our inner feelings to fill us up and allow our inner world to create our outside experience. We have to stop marking our successes from what we see outside, since it isn’t “real” anyway, but rather just a hologram of our inner world.
Repeatedly we are told to look outside for our validation! That is why so many spiritual teachers talk about non-attachment and that doesn’t mean we have to give up our passion and excitement for our lives! It’s about not looking outside ourselves for the outcome! When our energy is constantly searching the outside world to prove we are doing it “right” then we continue to put our focus on our outside world. We can still create the world that our soul and imagination desire but we create it from within!
If our state of being is compromised by a void of some kind then we are going to be creating from our fears whether we are aware of it or not. However, if we commit to an inner journey that acknowledges that void or place of fear, then we can truly begin to create a beautiful life. That beautiful life will be a reflection of our beauty and our divinity, which we have allowed to blossom within us. See the world for the hologram that it is. If you want to change something in your life, first connect with your Soul and your heart and fill up your inner world with who you truly are!
It is all just a change in perspective!